Chronique:BWU 10/07/2009

Posted by urk at 7/10/2009 3:35 PM PDT

Told ya we were gonna kick your ass.

For a while there it looked like you were gonna make us eat our words though, didn't it? We were throwing down on your own crazy pile of maps ('sup, Colonnade), the odds were stacked pretty high in your favor (like so many teetering blocks of stone), and let's be honest here, our four-man squads did their absolute best to let you walk out of the Bungie vs. The World party with a pretty easy victory.

Our fearsome foursomes stayed up later than most grown ass men should and thoroughly diminished the studio's liquor stash, draining it down to an empty pile of glittering bottles while they simultaneously feasted upon the unhealthiest of foodstuffs. The opportunistic among you took advantage of their drunken, stumble bum, and sugar-saturated state—a shameful way to win, I might add—to pull out ahead and build up what appeared to be an early and insurmountable lead.

But we knew from the moment we announced Bungie vs. The World that you were going to need all the help you could get if you hoped to come out of Bungie Day with your heads held high. Playing in a drunken stupor seemed like it should have provided you with all the advantage you needed to eke out an overall victory. But it turns out we overestimated your skill and no amount of self-imposed subversion on our part could have given you the boost you required.

And once it became crystal clear, even in our bleary-eyed and alcohol-addled states, that you weren't going to be able to pull it off without a ton of help, we tried everything we could to supplement your mental game, even going so far as to slip into some attire that should have given anyone a bit of positive reinforcement. Who wouldn't feel confident about going up against a guy in a Tinker Bell dress alongside his band of merry cosplay men? You, that's who. Turns out even a good, unhealthy dose of LARPing wasn't enough to get you back on the winning track.

What else could we have done? Played with blindfolds strapped on? Set down our controllers and simply walked out of the room to let you impotently flail about the maps, scoring accidental kills against our lifeless Spartans? Even we wouldn't stoop that low. We promised we'd play. So play we did.

Manly Man Fuel

Yeah, you got your asses kicked by these guys.

Eyes Are Up Here, Buddy

Prepare for Takeoff

Lord British, In Spaced

Cornucopia of Copiousness

The Post Bungie Day Carnage

Bungie, Lords of All We Survey - 72

The World, totally being surveyed so hard right now - 69

Maybe next time, chumps.

Tearful Man Memories

Okay, so the truth is that we barely came away with the win. Not only did you put up a hell of a fight, but for much of our 24-hour excursion it seemed that we were destined to eat a whole heaping helping of crow. Were it not for an epic push from team $#%! Shoot Me in the Face! (who it turns out spent their time shooting you in the face) as the final moments of Bungie Day ticked away, things would have definitely turned out differently.

But things didn't turn out differently did they? Nope. You stink.

To help ease the pain, here's a collection of quotes we solicited from the studio peeps who played during all hours of the day and night with you on Bungie Day:

"I have not been so humiliated at my poor online game skills, well, not since Butcher destroyed me in my interview at Bungie 3 yrs ago." -Jonty

"Yeah many thanks to the four Aussies who stayed up all night waiting to play Team Morning Wood so they could literally whomp our helmets into the floor with their codpieces. Good game guys." -Vic

"Even in defeat you're still a classy lady. Good game, World. Good game." -Ghintoch

"I personally feel good that even drunk and/or hungover, we can still conquer the world..." -cj

"'Sex Wizard. Glory Hole.' -Bob Glessner

"If I never see Chucky's 'chicken heart' again it will be too soon." -Tung

"All of it was a glorious blur of beer and snacks. And I blame all losses on Pinard's Mullet. Best match was getting grouped with some guys who at that time had been playing for 8 straight hours and the fatigue was setting in. If I remember correctly I believe they were from Australia. Any who they were so thankful to get matched. Then they promptly destroyed us. They really did an amazing job. Once the game was over we congratulated them on winning Recon. They quickly replied 'Recon is cool but honestly it was just nice getting to play with Bungie.'" -Sussman

"I don't have much of a story to tell, but it might be worth noting that I was:

• at the office
• playing Halo 3
• drunk off my ass
• in a gorilla costume

at 1AM to kick off Bungie vs. the World playlist with my compatriots. Atypical." -derek

"Shishka telling me that there was someone on the forums already posting about my pink Gloomy Bear hat I was wearing while playing as Team Twatter. Something about how we must be liquored up because the Bungie guys are wearing pirate hats and some pink thingy. I tip my pink hat to y'all who played us and destroyed us." -Ken Taya

"Watching my team aurally tear itself apart in the first game (Joseph shouting, "Luke, what the f*** are you doing over there???"), only to rally half way through and stomp them back down. Much in-fighting plagued our games (as is typical of playing with the two Lukes and Joseph), but someone had to keep the team together. My shoulders are tired. ;)" -Lars

"Joseph Tung believed that his teammates were sub-standard. I corrected him."

- Lee R. Wilson

"Our come-from-behind win after one of our opponents dropped was utterly sweet. I recommend that the dropper hire a bodyguard to protect him from his (former) friends." - David Aldridge

"Playing in Bungie vs the World was awesome! I don't know what the odds were, but I got matched up with the World like every game! Some of the World guys were actually pretty good, too, but we still beat them in the end :). I can't wait to see what the World does next year!" -Super-lucky Bungie Guy (Paul L.)

"I remember...

gg" -Javier

"The Test team needs a shout out for coming through in the final hours of Bungie Day and turning the tides back into our favor. We played 18 games and only lost 2, pushing the final score safely back into our hands and out of reach from 'the world'."

-Jon W

And Here's Your Reward

If you were lucky enough to sift out the proverbial needle in the digital haystack (and then proceeded to make that needle your biatch) you should have your shiny new set of duds right now. So, if you faced down one of our four-man squads and won - go ahead and fire up Halo 3 and check your armor perms.

And no, we're not going to post a list of gamertags. You know exactly why not.

For the players who ran into us and got their asses kicked, or those that didn't run into us at all, we're not going to leave you shivering out in the cold to soak in the shame of your defeat alone. The Bungie vs. the World playlist was so chockablock full of hot dude on dude action (and probably one or two chicks) - the end result being a mind-blowing 7,447,415 total player-games - that we're going to warm some spirits with a healthy number of Recon suits based on the bunch of super secret metrics we whipped up. What are those super secret metrics?

The Super Secret Metrics

Total number of Recon sets given away for people that beat (or tied!) Bungie: 328

The previously unannounced metrics for winning Recon in Bungie vs The World:

• All players from the first game of Bungie vs The World
• All players from the last game of Bungie vs The World
• All players with 77 EXP in the Playlist
• Top 7 players with the most kills (and < 3 registered DNFs)
• Top 7 players with the most assists (and < 3 registered DNFs)
• Top 7 players with the most eliminations (and < 3 registered DNFs)
• Top 7 players with the most killing sprees (and < 3 registered DNFs)
• Top 7 players with the most medals (and < 3 registered DNFs)
• Top 49 players with the most games played without a registered DNF
• Team of 4 that played the most games together without a registered DNF
• Top 77 players that finished a game despite their teammates DNF'd, that did not themselves DNF ever?
• Whoever scored the most kills against a Bungie employee in a game where their team lost
• Whoever died the most to Bungie employees in a game where their team lost
• Whoever got the longest spree most assists vs employees in a game where their team lost
• Whoever had the highest k/d spread in a game with Bungie where their team lost
• Whoever had the most sticks against Bungie in a game where their team lost
• Top 49 players with the highest kill/death ratio (and no registered DNFs)
• Top 343 players whose kills are divisible by seven
• Top 49 players with the most games played divisible by seven (and no registered DNFs)
• Top 49 players with the most medals divisible by seven (and < 3 registered DNFs)
• Players whose gameID number ends with 7777

Total number of Recon sets given away via metrics: 700+

Grand Total Number of Sets of Recon Armor Awarded: 1,000+

If our query scored a direct hit on your gamertag, your Recon should be delivered today as well. There won't be a message about it and you guessed it, we're not going to provide a list. Just go ahead and check your armor permutations in Halo 3 to see if Recon is waiting for you.

Remember, we will never need your personal information and will never ask for it in order to unlock Recon armor. If someone sends you a message asking for something from you in order to give you Recon, they are sleazy online jerks and they're not going to hook you up with anything but a pretty frustrating round of customer support calls to Microsoft.

Thanks for Playing

Regardless of how Bungie Day turned out for you on the swag front, we hope you had heaps of fun. We definitely did. Thanks for being the best -blam!- community ever.

Recappin'

If you're reading this and wondering what in the world all this blither blather about Bungie Day is, well, you already missed it. Good work. No worries though, you can still get up to speed on everything that went down. Including...

New Map Hawtness

"Wow, these maps look super cool and we've totally all been asking for a Midship remake and I'm not even going to be a jerk and make a thread about how I'm totally disappointed because my friend told me that he saw a YouTube video that confirmed that Bungie was making Blood Gulch!"

Man, we're really starting to hate your friend. His older brother too (though we hear he's working for Bungie now).

Anyway. Yeah, these maps are awesome. You can get 'em by picking up Halo 3: ODST in September. You'll also get every other Halo 3 map and you can can play the whole lot right off of the secondary disc that's packed inside. Sounds sweet? That's 'cause it is.

If you want to check these out in their super hugified, high resolution format, hit 'em up on the Halo 3: ODST Project Page.

Bam, Said the Lay-day

Your hair is a mess. Fix it up and then have a listen to this award-winning podcast. Okay, so it didn't win any awards just yet, but it's got Nathan Fillion. There's also new and exclusive Halo 3: ODST music, Marty and Joe discussing who's weathering the ravages of age with more grace, and Roger "The Wolf" Wolfson evoking some kind of monster, censoring himself, and dropping tons of great information about his baby, Bungie Pro Video.

Bungie Podcast: 70709

Bungie Pro Video is Live

Hey, as you may have read in this section's title, Bungie Pro Video is live! This feature lets you turn your Halo 3 Film Clips into awesome video you can play on your computer and share with all your friends. It's also included with Bungie Pro, the sweet suite of server-side extensions that already expands your Halo 3 File Share. Click the link below to learn more.

Bungie Pro Project Page

Blame Stosh (and Shishka)

Stosh found this. It's pretty apropos this week. Shishka's Bungie vs. The World playlist was so well received that he's decided to run it again as a 7 on the 7th playlist sometime soon (with some tweaks of course). If that makes you feel all tingly, make a doctor's appointment. If it makes you upset, blame Stosh.

We Are Leaving

Do have yourself a wonderful weekend. Do not inflict bodily harm upon yourself or others. Please return to our website should you wish to remain apprised of new and interesting developments. Thank you very much for playing.

Oh, one more thing before we shove off for the weekend . I figured I might as well leave you with a few choice news submissions from some folks who appeared not to enjoy this year's Bungie Day as much as we did. Seems wasteful to keep these gems all to myself.

Posted by at 7/7/2009 7:23 AM (-7)

-blam!- writes: i just wanna say tht bungie is -blam!-n -blam!- for not stating tht the bungie vs the world was mythic map packs, cuz i dont have them, and i was all excited all for -blam!-n nuthn so heres a little messgae to bungie -blam!- YOU BUNGIE ASS -blam!- LICKERS

-blam!- bungie
Posted by at 7/7/2009 10:02 AM (-7)

Stop the Suck writes: -blam!- u bungie you suck wat happened to the -blam!- winning -blam!- in the bungie day if u got off your fat asses and play against s we would appriciate it but o u suck just stop with the -blam!- -blam!- -blam!- u

Bungie Day to little empolyees online?
Posted by at 7/7/2009 12:51 PM (-7)

Face Me writes: Are there to little Bungie Empolyees online?

I think that there should be more than 4 employees on the playlist. It is unfair to the people who dont get a shot ot Bungie. So to all you bungie out there get online and face me. Dont forget all the rest of the Bungie fans.

Why Bungie?
Posted by at 7/7/2009 2:04 PM (-7)

Tons Prestige writes: Why Bungie 7 on 7 was a disaster searching from 9am to 9pm really 12 hours it was not something nice to do i could of player call of duty and got 10th prestiged before i accauly fount someone who is a bungie employee.

This was a waste of my time and the thing his i know i can beat bungie members and any one of them i would beat so i cant get recon no more until next maps come out.

I am not happy you should have had at least 10-20 teams on it was a disgrace for me to see how appuling it was i went through a lot of trouble so i could play on my xbox all day on it but it was a waste of time.

My chance for recon has completely gone and i would do anythink to 1 v 1 a bungie member or even 4 v 4 because me ( [gamertag removed]) and my mate ([gamertag removed]) was on xbox all day workin our guts out so it has really put me off of buying mythic map pack 2.

can i have recon
Posted by at 7/8/2009 10:40 AM (-7)

Recon Rhodes Scholar writes: i can have recon please

hey i am [name removed] i wasa wondering if i could get Recon armour becuase if u look at my gamertag and go to my fileshare u will see a video of me getting a awesome sniper double kill headshot with one bullet but whats funny is the bullet goes throught one guys helmet killing him and then bounces of it and kills a guy who just spawned diagnolly to the left of him.me sniper double kill headshot with one bullet but whats funny is the bullet goes throught one guys helmet killing him and then bounces of it and kills a guy who just spawned diagnolly to the left of him. please can have recon armour please my game tag is [tag removed] and recon please bungie and have done in my match

And...scene. Thanks for making our Bungie Day sweet.