Ilovebees/Maydays

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MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
black beach, nothing but sand and darkness. Sometimes, in the distance, dry lightning: in the flash I see pieces of the wreck around me, the spars and rigging of my brain

-hold on. hold on. Steady up. Get a grip, girl. You have to fight through this.

Take a deep breath.

Survival Key #3: How Badly Are You Hurt?

Mentally, subject is confused and disoriented.


I keep slipping in and out of consciousness.

Physically, subject is paralyzed but moving.

Okay.

What the hell does THAT mean?

Held down: yes. As if strapped to a table. Could I be in traction in some sick bay, some hospital ward?

Not necessarily one of ours.

But at the same time, parts of me being moved around, emptied out. As if under general anesthetic, dimly conscious, half-aware as the surgeon cuts off my feet and sews them onto my shoulders. She opens my head with a medical hammer and sand spills out.

I WANT TO DIE I WANT TO-

-no.

never that.

survive evade reveal escape. That is all you know, or need to know.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

Those are pearls that were her eyes:
Nothing of her that doth fade
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something rich and strange

Eight legs (I feel them walking on me) and how many voices-three? Five? Eight? - I am become a most delicate monster indeed.

What a brave new world-sand and darkness, sand and loneliness, sand and emptiness, sand and the spider-what a brave new world, that hath such monsters in it.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
Ship.
Wreck.

Shipwreck.

Wrecked.
Ship.

Shipwreck.

MY HEAD IS FULL OF SAND


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
All lost! To prayers, to prayers! All lost!

What, must our mouths be cold?

Arachne hung herself, you know. Take a hint already.

God my head hurts.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
Gap in the clouds: head suddenly much clearer.

The spider is working on me.

I must be in very bad shape.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
totally different kind of memory all of a sudden, floating up like a bubble from deep water, then *pop* on the surface of my mind. All in black and white for some reason, faded out, or just time bleaching the past like it does, time is hard that way, if you-

stop. stay on task, girl.
so *pop*, and I'm...

playing on the beach, very young, making a castle out of sand. It's a good castle, I'm smart, I'm really smart and I'm good with my hands and the castle is beautiful but the tide is coming up, I'm making dikes and moats and outer walls, getting a little desperate here this castle means the world to me it's way better than my brother's, but the tide is rising and rising, the tide is always coming up and no matter how hard I try to save what I have made, sooner or later the spiders wash over it and melt it down I'm losing the memory already I can't see myself was I wearing a dress or overalls or ...? There's a boy on the beach next to me but a wave comes up foaming with spiders and takes away his face-

oh.

we're made of sand.

we're both made of sand.

uh-oh.

I will stand firm. I will hold my edges and remember. I can do this. I know how to remember things, even through drugs and torture. seek evade reveal resist. I will not dissolve.

There are people who love me. I know that even though I can't remember them. I will not be forgotten. I will not be forgotten.

There are people who love me. There must be.

here come the spiders.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
nd in about half an Hour the Boat was overset by a sudden Flurry from the North. What became of my Companions in the Boat, as well as of those who escaped on the Rock, or were left in the Vessel, I cannot tell; but conclude they were all lost.

lay down on the Grass, which was very short and soft, where I slept sounder than ever I remember to have done in my Life, and, as I reckoned, above Nine Hours; for when I awakened, it was just Day-light. I attempted to rise, but was not able to stir: For as I happened to lye on my Back, I found my Arms and Legs were strongly fastened on each Side to the Ground; and my Hair, which was long and thick, tied down in the same Manner. I likewise felt several slender Ligatures across my Body, from my Armpits to my Thighs.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

FIELD EXPEDIENT DIRECTION FINDING

"Find a straight stick about a meter long and stand it upright on fairly level upright ground. Mark the tip of the shadow cast by the stick: wait 15 minutes: mark the shadow again. Draw a line from the first mark through the second and some way beyond. Stand with your left foot on the first mark and your right on the end of the line. In the northern hemisphere, you will now be facing north, and can recall the other directions by their relationship to north. In the south, contrariwise."

Hm.

No stick.
No sun.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY 

length:       120 meters 
crew:           40 
cover:         pleasure yacht 
ha 
               ir co    
                 lor:      b 
                     r   o 
                       wn

MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

"At night in the Earth's southern hemisphere, run an imaginary line along the axis of the Southern Cross to extend out about five times the length of that axis. Any landmark directly under that imaginary point will be in the general direction of south."

Any landmark.

Sandmark.

anything

anything

nothing


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

It happened one day, about noon, going towards my boat, I was exceedingly surprised with the print of a flea's naked foot on the shore, which was very plain to be seen on the sand.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

First thing I should do, make a signal.

The crew will come get me if they can.

Head is full of sand and it's hard to think.

But they won't stop looking for me.

I'M HERE I'M HERE I'M HERE

I'd fight for them. I'd die for them, any

of them. I would never abandon the crew.

They won't abandon me. They will come.

They will come for me.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

Of course the crew won't come for me if they're all dead. If they're all dead and I alone am left to tell the tale.

I'm crying, and my tears are made of sand.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
Phasmids.

I have to signal, I can't stay stranded here. But if I somehow am operating behind enemy lines, I don't want to draw attention to myself, either.

Therefore, I shall be a phasmid. Phasmidia Elegans, they call me-scourge of the sandbox.

God I hate it here.

Phasmids.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

I've been here forever.
Conscious, unconscious.

On, off. On, off. On off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off on off
on off on off on off on
off on off on off

Nobody here.
Nobody calling.
Nobody's going to come.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

Just remembered something important:

The Operator.

That was my nickname. That's what the rest of the crew called me when they didn't call me ... whatever my name was.

The Operator.

I wish I could remember their names.


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY

Tricky. Can't seem to focus. Need to start on the easy ones, like "up". Move on to the compass later.

Up.

Up.

...Damn it.

You'd think "up" wouldn't be too much to ask. It's not like nor-nor-east or something.

I need to find out where I am. Also who, but that might be less important. It's possible the two things are related.

Stars, I need stars. I was always a fine sailor; they said my navigation was celestial.

I think I am a fallen star. I should wish on myself. Please let me go home, please let me go home, please let me go home, please let me go home, please please please please please please please ple


MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY
Getting muddled here. Sick, obviously.

Broken inside. Not thinking straight.

Got to go back to first principles.

Survive evade reveal escape.

Survive-well, I'm not dead yet.
Evade-don't want to evade. I want to be FOUND.

...unless...

...of course, if I am behind enemy lines, then constantly shouting for help wouldn't be the smartest play in the world, would it?

got to run silent. got to run deep.

hide and go seek